Pas de Boob

Fred (of Fred and Ginger) came to visit me today in my librarian-like office. That was a nice surprise! What was even more surprising is that we managed to solve some of the university, and the worlds, problems in less than an hour. Pretty impressive. That lettuce kid dropped by, too. Good times.

We (the Gang of Three) also discussed the possibility of starting a log of M’s changes in appearance since he’s moved up in the “ivory tower” (I don’t know that a third tier state institution can be considered ivory). This includes facial hair changes, outfits, shoes, and accessories such as wallets. Some are worried that these changes will make him loose his “crazy cool” status. We’ll keep everyone posted on the log implementation.

L-bean was in the midst of a gay-man-lovers-distant-relationship imbroglio over the weekend. What a frickin’ mess those gay quarrels can be. Watch out is all I can say. The visiting lover was depleting the food chain at L-bean and gay-man-roommate-M’s fabulous apartment/condo near the lake like there was no tomorrow. Never bothered to buy any groceries, replenish supply, or treat them to dinner?!?!? Hello? Plus, why would you stoop so low as to drink soy creamer for liquid nourishment after depleting the food/liquid supply of the household? That’s desperation.

My those Utah polygamist wives of Warren Steed - whatever his weirdy ass name is - are a bunch of angry nutcases. They were screaming with rage at the reporters on ABC news tonight, and it scared the shit out of me – AND THEY WERE WEARING HOLLY HOBBY DRESSES!!!!!!!! Yikes. Cootieville to the max.

Well, I’ll bore you all with another letter from the past. This is more ballet oriented and was written to me by my friend M in 1982 (I was in Boston). This is just a segment of the letter. And you all thought ballet was romantic. Ha! (I’m keeping anonymity here because on rare occasions I hear from someone from my ballet past).

“…A tried to kiss me. GRODY! BARF OUT! H got her period in Chicago before we left for Newport and couldn’t get the tampon all the way in, so she wore it half way out all the way there! Blood seeping all over her clothes. Gross! She also gained weight because of her period and being around MT and G – the human vacuum cleaners. Her butt and her thighs got bigger, as well as the rest of her. She even got boobies! When she got home she called P to see if she could go to the island to rehearse and he told her she could if she got thin because she was plump in Newport!! Ha ha! I almost died. Tell your mom. Incidentally, MT is a little chubette, too. Sounds like you’re having a great time. Wish I was there! I’m crossing my fingers you get in the Four T’s performance. Oh yeah, thought you’d like to know what we performed. “Serenade” (where J fell and slipped because the stage is super slippery); “Jeux” (that was a joke! I’ll tell you more later); “Who Cares” (no one cared, that’s who. We were tired. I slipped during the second segment); “Invitation to the Dance” (I do my “famous” 16 fouettes and almost fall into the ocean. What a joke!); “Pas de dix” (or pas de boob. L’s boob came all the way out of her costume! That was funny as hell). Consider yourself lucky you got a letter from me!!

Talk to you soon,

Love M “

Has Ziggy's popularity faded? Apparently not!

As I've been cleaning and "redoing" my home office/crap store, I found several shoe boxes of cards and letters from years past. It was fun to re-read some of them, but I was becoming alarmed at the number of Ziggy cards that were sent to me. I don't remember ever mentioning that I had a fondness for Ziggy when I was a kid. I counted 48 Ziggy cards that were sent to me over a 7 year time span. Frankly, that's disturbing. I thought Ziggy was dead, but a quick Google search retrieved 489,000 hits, including a site called "All Things Ziggy." Yikes.

Anyway, here's a little snippet of a card that was sent to me from my childhood friend, Krissy. It was written in 1978:

"How are you? I'm fine. A couple of days ago your folks came over for dinner. How's ballet? I HATE LIZ!!! YUCH!! What is Ashley's last name? I'm going to tell you something that you've got to promise not to tell Kim (please!). Kim gets so moody it's pitiful. Kim is crazy over John Travolta so naturally Liz is too! I put up a few posters buts thats all. Kim is in love with him! By the way here are some of the things that are in style around here. You might want to get some before you come home.

1) Loves Baby Soft Body Mist
2) A poster of Grease or Saturday Night Fever

Speaking of SNF have you seen it yet? Oh, you might want to get the Grease album too. Martha is in California using...Jenny is visting her father. Emily is back from 3 lakes camps. My hand is killing me from writing. Well I've go to go now.

Love,
Krissy

p.s. I miss you
p.s.s. I can't wait till Fri
p.s.s.s. Don't let anyone read this!
p.s.s.s.s. write back!"

Gunk holing bros before hoes

My writing slump is in the most slumpiest state ever. There’s nadda thing happening upstairs – zip on the wit. Plus, I have my period and no marshmallows – damn it! I thought I had breast cancer, but it turns out I don’t. We had a bad storm during our sailing trip and I thought we were going to die, but it turns out we didn’t. So, I guess those are good things to write about, but I don’t really feel like writing about them. Too boring. Maybe I have ennui-o-phobia. I do think my recent marathon of reading good books, coupled with watching and listening to too much news and murder shows like “America’s Most Wanted,” have impacted my slump factor. I wonder what the cure for slump factor is? Maybe that would be a good reality show - Slump Factor. It would be a bunch of yahoos (or celebrities if it was “celebrity slump factor”) sitting around just saying “whatever,” “what’s the point” or “fuckin’ a.” Even the title of this blog entry doesn’t make sense, but it sounds good. Maybe I should just start writing what sounds good even if it’s made up bull cocky.

My super smart (almost scary smart) friend, Y, also a librarian, sent me the newest subject headings just released by the Library of Congress. The world of cataloging is an underground wacky group that even I – a member of the library profession for 13 years – don’t understand. But it is, nonetheless, tres intriguing and I’m fascinated by it all. Damn, I wish I had taken cataloging when I was in grad school. Frickin’ library school curriculum changes! I'll let you make your own comments. Anyway, here they are:

- Civil commitment of sex offenders
- Condom use
- Creative destruction
- Cross-border shopping
- Domestic terrorism
- Family secrets
- RSS feeds
- Surprise birthday parties
- Ex-gay movement
- Monogamous relationships