Sleazy Motels

The German checked into what I’m convinced is a sleaze bag motel in Texas. He said there was no light in the room, so he had to ask someone at the front desk for a lamp, and he had to put a deposit down for the TV REMOTE CONTROL! Hello? Granted, the man is as cheap as dirt, but there’s a difference between being cheap and being stupid. It’s probably attached to some hussy/pawn shop. Jesus. I better spray him down with Lysol when he returns.

I’ve been depressed for about a week now and can’t shake it. My friend broke up with her boyfriend, my other friend’s daughter has an eating disorder, I’m still haunted by sassy girl’s comments about my shitty skin, “Bareback Mountain” is not playing anywhere in the Central Wisconsin vicinity because god forbid we show anything gay (this is a hot movie by the way. I saw it in Chicago and it left me wishing I were a gay cowboy. I still fantasize about this), the survey I looked at today about the new web site included comments such as “what the fuck is this?” and “this page sucks wad!” I’m so glad I’ve spent a year of my life working on this project for these constructive comments. Arrrggh.

ANABLOG – word of the day from Urbandictionary.com

The old fashioned journal you wrote in with crushed tree pulp, binding, and maybe some kind of lock mechanism. For some reason people used to like writing opinions only they read. It is a fad past its prime but Borders still sells them for some reason.

"What is that odd rectangular shaped device you have in your lap that appears to be filled with blue lined 2 dimensional pieces of non-digital substance?"

"Oh this is just my anablog...I write it in to remember things and keep my private thoughts"

"I see, so how do you post it when you're done?"

Davusten Burraris Syndrome

I’m back in the land of cheese, fireworks, beer and “naughty girl” highway shops. My house is a mess, and of course I can’t clean like a normal person. No, I have to take every frickin’ thing out of every drawer, box, container and clean it. Now, it will take me 12 months just to get through the kitchen. The German will not be happy that I’m getting rid of our coffee maker and toaster oven. Luckily, he’s out of town.

My last few days in Chicago were fun and jam packed with activities – movies, drinking, shopping, drinking, dinners, drinking, museums, drinking, etc. I even got to have dinner with an old mobster and Johnny Depth. That was fun. Nothing like sitting with a guy that’s been convicted of mail fraud, tax evasion and the murder of a corporate executive (he was not convicted of this – just suspected). Anyway, good times and good linguini.

I’m still suffering from my “Davusten Burraris” syndrome. I just can’t get enough of these two. I wonder if this particular genre is going to become passé. Hard to say. I hope not. I highly recommend “Magical Thinking.”

I had a facial before I left the city from a young sassy black girl that graduated from the Dudley School of Beauty. Let me just say that she was quick to criticize my aging skin, large pores, broken capillaries, sun damage, wrinkles, and dark circles. On several occasions during the “procedure” she reminded me, with high pitched snickers, that “they didn’t have the products back then that we have today to help with your skin problems.” What? Jesus. I mean I don’t need a young sassy black girl with perfect skin telling me how tragic my aging sun damaged face is and how sad that there weren’t products available for me WAY BACK WHEN. What the fuck ever. Is this what the Dudley School of Beauty faculty is teaching these young estheticians?

The New Year in Chicago

The re-introduction of fast walking
London fog
Vietnamese “nail hussy” factory salons
New smoking ban (in Chicago??)
Fabulicious food
Too much eating
Hanging with L
Civilized brunch with the upper crust at Four Seasons
Non-Caucasians
Lottsa walkin’
Toronzo Blues
“Cocks ‘n Robbers” and Johnny Depth
Salute to Vienna
Grandma’s trailer park hold-up
Mr. Cheese slobber
Professional zit extractions (ouch!)
Starbucks in building (fab)
Scary cab rides
Hemorrhaging money
A’s kick ass promotional piece for publisher catalog
City Florist
Kamehachi
H&M
Elevators
Fox & Obel
Convenience
Energy
Sound of sirens
Noise
Cool footwear