Casting Couch
God, I love Vanity Fair! It’s like the police blotter and gossip rag of the rich and famous. Here’s a snippet interview from one of my favorites, Sue Mengers – Casting Agent (VF, June 2005):
Which living person do you most admire?
My plumber
What is your greatest extravagance?
Grass
What is your favorite journey?
From the living room to the bedroom
Which talent would you most like to have?
I'd take any one
If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?
That I don't have any
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Not having children
What is your favorite occupation?
Sleeping
What is the quality you most like in a man?
That he breathes
How would you like to die?
I think I already have
What is your motto?
"Tomorrow may not be another day."
I was trying to think of other jobs I'd like to have aside from the exciting world of librarianship (cough cough). Here are a few:
- Art Theft Investigator - FBI
- Mimicker
- "Smack my ass" aerobics instructor
- Bunny & squirrel rehabilitation expert
- Male brothel entrepreneur (N and I are already investigating this)
- International party girl
- “Words to avoid in public” consultant – e.g., come, probe, titillating (you get the idea…)
- Underwear tailor for Lenny Kravitz or that “bad” doctor on Grey’s Anatomy.
- Penis scarf maker
posted by BibFash at 10:10 PM
2 Comments:
Hmmm...I thought for sure you'd comment on Saturday's party, but now I realize that you may not remember too much of that. I think, between myself and several of your friends, we might be able to piece it back together for you. I've already heard a few of these "friends" quoting you from that night.
Anyways...
Dear Dr. Bibfash,
I could use some advice about how to survive with the in-laws living in town and all. How often will I be expected to a)eat out with them, b)accompany them to the grocery store and on other errands, c)visit them at their house, and d)tolerate unannounced drop-ins at ours? I have a feeling that my numbers will be lower than what they would estimate. They close on their house today and will be officially moved in by the end of the month. I'm askeared.
4/20/2006
Dear Dr. Bibfash,
I have a problem I hope you can solve. My friends get together every Thursday night for drinks at a local pub. It is great fun and the pub itself is swell. The problem is that I have delicate lungs (it's a horror, believe me) and too often the swell pub is filled with cigarette smoke. I can't stay long and spend the next three or four days wheezing, coughing, and overusing my enhaler. I just can't attend Thursday at the pub any longer, but I miss hanging out with my friends. So, my question is how can I convince my pals that we should move Thursay nights to someone's backyard -- we can buy beer (they love beer!) and make gin and tonics or other summery cocktails and we can even grill food. I'd be more than happy to orchestrate such events (I love to plan a party) but how can I get my friends to agree? Help me Dr. Bibfash!
A Sad Little Plum
4/23/2006
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