Munchkins and Timbits

The donut Nazis opened the floodgates today to the lay people through capitalist practices by selling a surplus of spongy sweetened breads at 50 cents a pop. It was uncanny! Insane (inane?)! A mark in our Library’s history. It will rest in the archives of my Outlook calendar forever. While the leader and imperial chancellor has never been known, it falls under the umbrella organization - Kaffee Freikorps (KF) – a group known for its mission-style military tactics. The “washing of the brain” begins right at the inception of employment, when suspiciously pleasant looking “sturdy” people slowly saunter to your desk asking for a nominal fee to support KF. Rejecting membership to this group results in shifty-eyed looks and sneers throughout your employment. Today, however, through declassified documents (and rumors), I learned that the Doughnut Scriptures: Resurrection of Bismarck has been revised after skeptics questioned its divine origin. The new testament, Cruller und Pfannkuchen vereinigt Euch! embraces regional variations, such as the Oliebollen, Sufganiot and Beignet, opening the disputed donut history to the “Free Library World.”