Daddy Long Legs

In less than 24 hours, I’ve had two fashion questions for my advice column. I knew putting “Dr.” in front of my name would make a world of difference.

My friend, “other N,” has spent a ridiculous amount of money on tall-sized pants from J. Crew (like $500! Was she high when she bought these?). Anyway, her problem is that she’s a lanky gal, and the new pants she purchased have a 35” inseam and are a tad too long. She’s worried about ruining them while walking. Plus, she can’t return them because they were on sale.
Well, there’s an easy fix to this quandary: High heels! Like CFM stiletto high. Then you don’t have to worry about scuffing the cuffs, and you can look down on everyone because you’ll be superiorly tall. I think that would be most awesome. Alternatively, you can have that cosmetic leg shortening surgery. I think there’s a local guy here who performs these, along with orthodontic work. I can get the name for you, and I’ll look into local tailors. I vote HIGH HEELS!!!

Fashionably yours,
Dr. BF